Should Boris Johnson succeed Cameron as prime minister?

June 28, 2016

Since David Cameron resigned as prime minister after the Brexit vote, Boris Johnson is one of the favourites to replace him.  Some people say “Not Boris!  He’s a liar!”  And indeed he is a bullshitter of great renown.  Here are some of his lies:

“As Mayor of London he promised to totally eradicate rough sleeping by 2012; it doubled under his leadership. His 2008 manifesto promised there would be manned ticket offices at every station; he closed all of London’s ticket offices. He aimed to reduce transport fares; they increased by 4.2 per cent.”

But why should this disqualify him?  All politicians are liars (I think… name one high-ranking politician who has never lied and I will accuse you of fibbing…)

I can think of other reasons why he shouldn’t be prime minister.  If he does turn out to be a serious contender, I might list some of these to you.  But for now: stop flapping!


Gove: "You're a liar, Boris!" Johnson: "Aren't we all...?"

Gove: “You’re a liar, Boris!”
Johnson: “Aren’t we all…?”

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Britain First a terrorist organization? (No.)

June 17, 2016

After the shocking murder of Labour MP Jo Cox, shot to death in the street outside her constituency office in  Birstall, people are beginning to wonder: is Britain First a terrorist organization?

Several witnesses to the murder have confirmed that the killer, a 52 year old man named locally as Tommy Mair, shouted “Britain First!” as he slew her.  According to The Guardian, Graeme Howard, 38, who lives in nearby Bond Street, told the Guardian he heard the man shout “Britain first” before the shooting and during the arrest.  A second eyewitness, Clarke Rothwell, claimed that the man shouted “Britain First, Britain First.”


Tommy Mair: allegedly shouted “Britain First” while murdering MP

Aamir Tahir, of the Dry Clean Centre, said the gunman was heard shouting “Britain first”.

He said: “The lady I work with heard two loud bangs but I wasn’t there, I was stuck in traffic at the time. I wish I was there because I would have tried to stop him.”

And, perhaps the most damning allegation:

Witness Daniel Blyth, 38, a company director from the town, told the Yorkshire Post newspaper that the assault was “unusual”. He added: “I saw seven police cars racing up Leeds Road towards Morley. They were unmarked BMWs,” he said.

“There are two helicopters flying overhead. It all seems very dramatic. I have heard that two people have been shot but I’m not who are why. It’s all very unusual for Birstall.”

So, was “Tommy Mair’s”attack a Britain First plot?  Britain First, a far-right political party campaigning for Britain to leave the EU, deny this, saying the reports were “pure hearsay”. It described the attack as a “despicable crime” and added: “We are nothing to do with it.”(“though they would say that, wouldn’t they,” ha ha bonk).  Maybe “Mair” was pissed off about the chance that Britain may vote to stay in the EU… but that still makes “Britain First!” an odd choice of warcry.  Incidentally, Jo Cox was pro-Europe.

The suspect in the MP’s death is believed to have had long-term links to the Springbok Club, a hard-right group that has campaigned against the EU.

He also purchased a gun-making manual from a far-right neo-Nazi group, new documents suggest.

So is Britain First a terrorist organization that should be proscribed, like the Islamist groups that have preached jihad against the West?  Probably not.  But if I shouted “Allahu Akbar!” while shooting politicians, I’m sure the security services would be looking for any link, no matter how tenuous, between me and ISIL etc.

Just let me make it clear: I’m not claiming that Britain First is a terrorist group, nor that there’s any link between this murderer and the organization.  I’m just asking questions.  Which is one of the rights I get living in democratic Europe rather than Syria or the USA.  So don’t get mad at me.  I didn’t invent these stupid bastards.

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Archbishop of Canterbury says racists are not racists

March 11, 2016

Bob Dylan, pretending to be Justin Wellsby

Justin Wellby, the archbishop of Canterbury, has jumped into the you’re racist – no I’m not- yes you are debate by announcing that it isn’t racist to say that bloody foreigners are coming to Britain to steal jobs from hard-working red-white-and-blue blooded layabouts while receiving free mansions and cars paid for by our – yes, our, not their, hard-earned tax money that we don’t get anyway cos Brits can’t find work here anymore, all the jobs go to bloody Poles and Romanians who have the bare-faced cheek to get up early and get to work on time so they don’t get sacked for being late.  Bloody foreigners etc.  It’s all down to the EU, if we vote to leave the European Union jobs will fall from the sky like anvils and we’ll be abvle to skip through vistas of Bambified rabbits, birds whistling Beethoven (great Brit, that Beethoven, you wouldn’t catch a bloody Kraut writing such beautiful sounds would ya?) and employers virtually press-ganging folk into jobs that are Grrreat! (the British Tony the Tiger, not the American one who, although he does a good job spying on the Muslims for us, he just isn’t British, is he?  Is he??  Pass me a burning cross, I think this area needs a bit of ethic cleansing!!!).

So, vote to Leave the EU or Europe will force us to employ convicted child sex offenders as teachers and will burn public sector workers for wearing small, unobtrusive crosses while those curry-smelling Pakistanis can swan around in masks all they want, the bleeding criminals.  Alf Garnett had it right when he was taking the piss out of our Enoch Powell love affair.  You can’t say nuffin’ no more, even though the European statutes on human rights defend our right to freedom of expression, doing more than our wonderful British governments managed to do during their millenia of rule over these isles.

It makes me smile when at Last Night at the Proms all the patriots get all proud and weepy as they sing “Jerusalem”, still failing to realise it’s a piss-take, when Blake wrote those words he was having a laugh at your expense, you stupid “patriots”.  FFS!

“Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.”
– Samuel Johnson

“They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings steal a little and they throw you in jail. Steal a lot and then they make you king.”

– Bob Dylan


Click Stewie!  Now!  Do it!!

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